Just seen this joke on YSA site

3 women in a cafe.
First woman said, ‘I’m having a boob job.’
Second woman said, ‘I’m having my twat bleached.’
Third woman said, ‘I can’t imagine your husband with blond hair

Coloured man on the top deck of a bus wanking merrily away, woman gets on the bus at the next stop, sits behind him then notices what he's up to, shocked she says to him "you scum" he replies "ahh nose ahs cum, ahs cum twice already"






I'll get me coat

More jokes from YSA site



I know it's copying but I can't be arsed to type

85% of Liverpudlian males say they enjoy sex in the shower.
The other 15% haven't been to prison yet.

Just bought a racehorse called 'My Face', It may not be any good but I
can't wait to hear all the women in the crowd screaming 'come on .. .My Face'

I've just been to my first Muslim birthday party! Musical chairs was a bit
slow but fcuk me pass the parcel was fast!

Two Irish couples decide to swap partners.
Afterwards Paddy said to Murphy that's the best fcuk I've ever had, I wonder
how the girls got on ?

......more

HOW TO SATISFY A WOMAN

KISS HER
CARESS HER
CUDDLE HER
CHARM HER
PRAISE HER
PAMPER HER


TO SATISFY A MAN













SUCK HIS KN*B



PADDY ON TENTH FLOOR OF BURNIN BUILDIN
FIREMAN SHOUTS "JUMP LAD WE WILL CATCH YOU IN THIS BLANKET"
PADDY SHOUTS BACK "F*CK OFF I DONT TRUST YOU, LAY IT ON THE FLOOR"

Another not so good joke

When is a fairy not a fairy?

When she's sucking a pixie's cock.............


..........then she's a goblin


Boy goes into parents bedroom an sez to dad 'Wots the difference between a vagina and a cunt?'
dad lifts up the mothers nighty 'That's a vagina'
Boy 'Wow, can I touch it?'
'NO! that'll wake the cunt up!


Look I can only put up wot I get sent 's

boy cums down stairs n says to his dad--''whats-love juice''??-----dad thinks its about time his boy and him had a chat-so he sits him down and starts--blah blah blah.....then hopefully she gets nice n wet down there so you can then stick your willy in and etc etc etc----and that wetness is called ''love juice son''--the boy looking abit sick by now says ok then dad cheers,his dad sez why-what you watchin in yer bedroom son???-------tennis dad-tennis!!!!

2 birds on there way home from a nite out-they want to go for a pee so nip into the local cemetary,one wipes herself with her knickers and throws them away-one looks round for something to wipe with and decides to use a wreath.........................................................following nite both there husbands are sat in the pub together and the first guy says..''think our lass is having an affair-come home without any knickers on last night''---second bloke--''thats nowt,our lass come home with a little note up her muff saying-thanks for the great times-from all the lads at the fire station!!!!

The reverend John Flaps on seeing one of his female parisioners drunk, in the local pub, was trying to assist her out of the pub when they both tripped and he ended up on top of the lady..............

On seeing this the Landlord shouted Eh ! M8 you can't do that in here............ to which the reverend replied ............ you don't understand I'm Pastor Flaps.......... to which the Landlord replied ............... If your that far carry on M8 but don't do in here again

paster flaps!!!!!!=ace!!!

Had this sent by text




Elton John and George Michael have teamed up to compose a gay musical based on the Wizard of Oz..............


They're calling it 'Swallow My Yellow Thick Load'..........


Soz, best I've had today

little boy comes running into his mum in the kitchen and sez-''grannys got a prawn''--so his mum lets him take her to show her 'grannys prawn''----on seeing gran fast asleep on the sette with her bits hanging out he points to grannys prawn---his mum sez ''thats not her prawn son-its her clitoris''----boy replies---------------''well it tastes like a prawn''!!!!!!